Ostomy care: Stealth BeltDon't laugh, but being alone is no fun There is one I belong to on Facebook. A dating site for people with Crohn's , ulcerative colitis, IBD, cancer, ostomies. You need to friend them then they approve you. I did not look where you are from but to me it seems like there are a lot of people from the UK, Canada. There people from the US on there too. Check it out.
I tried to contact the moderator but the member had already quit the group. I felt absolutely horrified and at a loss because I could not do anything. Inspire is a site with compassion, support, friendship, and love. I feel blessed to have a group of people like this in my life. I clicked on this I thought it would be interesting to find someone like me to talk with about things. Like dating and sex I've had an ileostomy bag for a month and don't know how well it's going to go over. I have already started conversations with a girl I know about my ostomy bag showed her what it looks like and explain how it works.
But, I feel self conscious about the idea of having sex with an ostomy bag hanging between us during intercorse. I don't really know how it will work and or how much of a mood breaker a poop bag will be. I don't think it's going to play out right. I've been thinking about it a little bit since I am a man.
But I don't know frankly is all I'm saying. Joe, You don't have to have the bag during sex. You can get a stoma cap. Also, go to ostomysecrets. If you find the right woman, all will be fine.
Joe; If you look anything like your photo I'm quite sure that finding a girl who loves you body and soul will come to you when you are ready. Too bad I am 50 and in Canada! You have only had your ileostomy for a month so I'm quite sure that you are still in the very early stages of healing and coming to accept your new body and the way in which it functions.
You will have good days and bad. It is a bit of a roller coaster ride but eventually things smooth out. Continue to use this site for support, ideas and good ol' fashioned friendship. Michelle and Lily my ileostomy. The more I come here and read, the more I feel like you all are in my head and reading my thought!!!! Thanks everyone for the sites to visit. Hi, I found a site called Prescription4love. I was thinking they needed to have a site or it would be a great idea and found this while searching.
Just having companions with the same health challenges would be nice to have. Hey that sounds like a good site thanks for the info and yes. A companion would be great nice to have someone to share things with. This discussion is closed to comments. To start a new discussion in this community, please click here. I may have already asked this question but I don't see it posted so I'm going to ask again to be sure I would like to know if there are any I had a whole other vision for it after my ostomy surgery, but this person, right here, in a hospital room getting bad news?
This is my life. Until the person next to me, the person who responded to the news of my ostomy when we first met with a poop joke, responded with another poop joke. The kind that made me laugh so hard that all the ugly tears shook off my face. And as he wiped the remnants of them away, he reassured me. With a few simple words, he reminded me of my actual life. Yes, I am the sick one. In black and white, that is my life.
Some days I will be an adventurer.
Dating sites for ostomates
And some days I will be sick. And their support will be everything. Wow… your story really touched me. Thank you, so many time almost all the time I have felt what you have felt and still do. I for the last 4 years have been alone in my mind dealing with so many issues even though I to like you have a loved one going thru it with me by my side every step of the way, I could not have made it with out my wife.
OstoDate is not just a dating site or a Social Network site for people with an Ostomy and for people with Ostomy related interests but a total community of friendly.
I shed tears when you spoke of the child remembering the day I read it. I am in my 41st year of my surgery and now have a support group for those having had the surgery. Prior to there coming to me I see the same embarrassment on all of them about admitting their surgery.
Good Lord, Why? I would love to chat with you. Your email address will not be published. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam.
Learn how your comment data is processed. United Ostomy Associations of America P. Call us toll-free at: If you have an emergency, please dial or contact your local medical professional. Join our national advocacy network and take action on issues that affect the quality of life of all people living with an ostomy or continent diversion in the United States.
Since my opperation i have been told in very clear terms that there is going to be no sex for the duration of my bag. Luckily its only 6 months until i have my reversal but when u add the 2 months prior it seems like a life sentance.
I understand her feelings but im just a bit disappointed and sexually frustrated. I love my wife more than anything and i would never cheat under any circumstance. Erectile Dysfunction posted by Winston.
Let's start by saying that I don't have, never had, and never will have a body part that is worth my life. Given the choice of "We remove this or you die of cancer" that's not even the beginning of a question for me or for my husband. That said Not to put too fine Ranting posted by. I haven't dated since my surgery a year and a half ago. I just can't imagine any woman would or could be interested in me now.
I'll just have to accept being alone for the rest of my life. It will be very lonely, but at least no one will worry about me when I fly into a fit of rage about my predicament, which happens alot now.
I don't want any sympathy. I don't need anybody's inspiring words. I'm posting this to rant and keep from breaking things or hurting myself for at least while I'm typing. I hate my life to bad I can't change things. Is It Just Me? Okay, I'm going to put myself out there with this one. I really miss sex. I know I'm married, but sex with my wife and I has gone the way of the dinosaur.
It very rarely happens, I mean I can count on one hand how many times in a year I can't help but think it is the ostomy. Every time I try to talk about it, I get the "nothing's wrong" answer, yet nothing changes. I admit that we never had a wild sex life, but sincenot so much. I even work out on a regular basis to try to give her something to look at besides my osto Hi, this question is kind of personal and embarrising.
But I am going to throw it out there anyway. Back in june I had to have an abdominal perineal resection which is removal of rectum and anus along with a permanent colostomy. The problem is that ever since the surgery I have experienced painful intercourse to the point that I dread it. I have tried lubes but it doesn't work. It seems like there is a connection between the surgery and the problem. It feels like that when they sewed up my back end during surgery half my other opening got sewn What's The Point??
Hi Everyone, Im Niamh I've been a member for over a year but have been a bit quiet. Just felt I needed to post this I'm feeling really down at the minute.
I've had an ostomy since after 2 years of hell with UC. I had a boyfriend all through my illness but he couldnt accept the bag after the op and the relationship broke down 9 months later. I've only recently felt like getting out there and meeting somebody. I'm a really loving and affectionate person and miss having somebody to share my life with. I met a really nice guy a I'm Devastated posted by leah. Masochism And The Ostomate posted by emc. I'm now equipped with a colostomy bag, which if all goes well will be removed in a handful of months.
Now that I'm largely recovered from the surgery, I'm getting back to the dungeon. There are some obvious ostomy-related safety concerns. OstomyArmor looks like an excellent and comfortable system for protecting the stoma, but the images show that the colostomy bag is exposed. The same company produces a kevlar bag protector, wh I am 28 and gay with an ostomy bag. I feel like the only one, even though I know there must be others, I don't know any. I am concerned that I won't be able to find anyone who will date me because I have a bag.
The possibility of ending up alone scares and depresses me. I truly want a partner and family one day and I just feel that people may discount what I have to offer simply because of my ostomy bag.
When Is The Right Time posted by malcie Hi to everyone on the site this is my first post a newbie so to speak. Never done this before and feeling a bit indifferent doing it, although needs must I supposeand you guys know the issues and have been through similiar, and hopefully have some good suggestions.
I have not properly dated since I was diagnosed and subsequently had my surgery, I am now three years post op and even though as to-date I have not been too bothered I am really starting to miss the comforts of having someone close to share my lifes ups and downs with.
Ostomy Site Scam Alert posted by. Just a heads up guys Looks like "glorylunama4u" is a fraud and sending the same email to every man on this site!!!!!!
The World's First Ostomy and Crohn’s Dating and Social Network Site.
How is this possible. How do you go through all the redtape of dating or a date then explain your situation? How can you charm that girl only to reveal a gross characteristic? I've tried. Then I never hear from them again. The word-of-mouth thi Or Not. With A Colostomy posted by. I have a question for you single ostomates out there who have tried the dating thing. I haven't gotten up the courage to do that since my colostomy and I'm not sure I ever will.
Just wondering whether there is an official dating/friendship site for people with an ostomy/urostomy/ileostomy? It would be so much more. An online dating website for people with Ostomies, Crohn's, Colitis, IBD and their Ostomy Inc. @Ostomy . Bag-a-Date @BagaDate 10 Jun Just wanted to ask people is it really possible to date when you have a bag? From things I have read on this site the answer is no. People say its either to hard to.
Could sure use some input on the subject. When do you tell a prospective date about it? My gut tells me to put my cards on the table and tell them immediately, thus giving them plenty of time to head for the hills.
In looking I saw there is a site to meet other Ostomates so you may want to try there if POF, does not represent a good majority of dating IMO. I was afraid of dating with an ostomy, but I was no longer willing to feel like a burden or anything less than sexy. I would be okay being single. Join our Ostomates Dating and find your a hot date with just a few mouse clicks! We have hundreds of ostomy singles waiting to meet someone just like you!.
But if you do that, you'll never meet anyone. Should you wait until the first date and then tell them? It's me again Shall I share my secrets with you guys No How to be the perfect lover! From Me, Myself and I. I Just Need To Vent! Is it just me or it is hard to convince ourself that the surgery have not played a part in the choice of someone to go with someone else rather than you eh?
Lol Really I mean, I am pretty impressed, most people deal well with it and won't make you feel bad or what not about it At the least its been the Why So Shy posted by. I don't often look at this site, if at all but for some reason, may be the heat getting to me, I decided to dip in. I was surprised to see that nothing was posted up on the dating bit. Now I ask, is this because no-one outside of Milton Keynes with an enhancement is dating, or is it that you all are in happy relationships and don't want to talk about it.
Sorry, I don't buy either explaination. I have been an ostomate for 9 years and have been in a couple of relationships, good and not so good. As a woman of 49, Feeling Unattractive posted by Gear Jammer. Lately I find myself struggling with feeling unattractive Partly due to a lack of attention from my spouse, and partly due to how I look shirtless Before my ileostomy, I was always shirtless when the weather got hot But after surgery in '08, I'm never without some kind of shirt on It never really bothered me before, as I gained quite a bit of weight after I could eat again, but now that I've "levelled out" and am back into half-decent shape, I miss going shirtless in the summer.
So so my question is this There was a lady who had an ileostomy and felt due to her pouch that she would never find love. I had my ileostomy when I was Yes it was hard to get over it but never have I felt undatable! Dating posted by meglb. Sometimes, i think it would be easier to wear a sign that says: I have a colostomy, if still interested call Dating is hard enough!!
Hey all, as per the title I'm at a bit of a low place right now. I've had my permeant stoma for 18 months now I had a looped ileostomy for 18 months previously and suffered yet another pushback for a nice woman. My Crohn's and subsequent mass of operations ended my previous 7 year relationship. I have taken my time in getting back into the "meeting women" scene as I have been very ill, and it's making me regret agreeing to a proctocolectomy, which is strange as I know things had been desperate and agony b I have a date this weekend and am not sure how to bring up the subject of my ostomy.
I don't think anything is going to happen, but it was a fairly important event in my life I'm not secretive about it and not ashamed of it by any means Spent a month in the hospital I'm better now though. Well, mostly. Had another surgery last summer and probably coul Desperate For Advice! Here we go all this something new to me so please be patient with me I've had ostomy surgery almost a year ago. Before my surgery we were very sexual!! Naturism posted by Cheekymonkey Has anyone had any experiences in this environment good or bad?
I Want It I just have to say this outloud Thinking posted by three. What do you think was happening, and what do you think each person in this photo was thinking at the moment the photographer captured this image? Be careful how you respond because your thoughts reveal much about your life experiences.
What Do Men Think? What do men think of women who tell them they are hooked up to a colostomy? I'm speaking mainly of those men who are potential dating partners. How do I get up confidence to start dating again? It's been over 2 years. Hello everyone! Well where do I start Even words of encouragement like "if I had of known you were going to be this healthy I would have suggested it years ago" I've read some of the posts wrt finding someone who doesn't run when they hear about dear baggy and am starting to feel hopeles No One Talks To Me Destined To Be Single posted by Mumof1.
Noone talks to me at all. I have a feeling ill be single for life I came on here as had no luck meeting anyone near me and now nothing on here Well, I did not think this would happen but I am absolutely unable to take any more of the verbal and mental abuse.
I gave my spouse the news that I am leaving on June 1st. He literally has had 12 years and 10 months to make things work between us but when only one person is trying, it doesn't fix things very well.
Early on in our relationship, he lost all desire for intimacy. He said he just wasn't interested. I begged him to please see the doctor and try to get something done.
He did and the doc said i The J-pouch And Sex? It says in the books I've read that sex can feel different and painful after having your rectum removed and I was just hoping to hear from some people, preferably girls about how they felt after having a J-Pouch. I'd be glad to hear from everyone, not just people Sexy Underwear posted by. Sex Now Hurts posted by vanessavy. I had the BCIR surgery 4 months ago with removal of my large intestine, galbladder, rectum and anus.
I have had sex 3 times but it hurts. It feels like the inside of my vagina about 3 -4 inches in will not stretch or let anything through. Is that normal? Just very frustrating My husband said he can't tell and gets annoyed since I have to stop. Even with a ton of lube. Just very odd. Question For The Ladies posted by macsac1. Would you date a man with a foot fetish?
Have you ever had anyone lick the soles of your feet or suck your toes? Is that something you might enjoy? A Terrible Loss. My Heart is Broken Torn and tattered. The Loss Profoundmy world is shattered. My tears flow I cry His Love is Gone. I was single before my operation and have 2 lovely girls. I would like to meet some special, male.
I have tried dating and obviously have had to tell potential new boyfriends.What is an Ileostomy?
I found that very hard as I cant really come to terms with it. They have been reassuring that it makes no difference. Why do I feel after telling them I am not good enough, begin to feel paranoid that they dont really like and iv put them off.
I cant shake the feeling and end up calling it a day. Anyone got any dati Dating posted by Single parent 27 years old had my ostomy since may think I need to start dating! Sex After Ileostomy posted by mohouser. I had Crohn's and got an ileostomy in I am a 65 year old man who has been married since I have read similar stories as mine on this site. My wife is my ostomy nurse she helps me shave and change my bag. I don't know what I would do without her.
But, that is where the love stops. Since the surgery we have become nothing more than roommates. The sex and romance are gone. It wasn't great for the ten years of battling Chron's prior to my surgery either.
She simply has no interest and will not talk about it. She hasn't looked me i Hi everyonethis is the first time I've ever posted anything but I need help. My issue is my wife has confessed that she doesn't know if she can stay with me having a colostomy.
I had surgery October 29, and it hasn't been easy. My bowls blocked on three separate occasions causing me to spend more time in the hospital. And my bag has exploded during the night 4 or 5 Times with my wife waking me up with me sitting in a pool of feces. Because of t I see many folks say their interested in a relationship in their profiles, but is having an ostomy really a good enough reason to seek out someone with the same problem for a mate?
I'm not criticizing, just trying to understand what this site is really all about. I find that as we get older we get pickier, not more tolerant of each other. So are ostomates more willing to overlook things in fellow ostomates that Motorbikes posted by celia Hi i am seeking a motorbiker in the south west for friendship first,i am a good pillion the best been on bandit,v-max,dragstar,blackbird,hyabusa,xjr 0 to name but a few.
I live near yeovilton single no ties,wouls love to meet a like minded person for rideouts shows racing etc.
The Ostomy and Crohn's Dating Site and Social Network. Talk to people with ostomies, get support, find friends or start a relationship. Once I started gaining weight back, becoming more confident with my ostomy, and regaining my self-esteem, I went on a dating site. Dating is hard enough as it .
If you feel i am seeking you please contact. Safe riding Feel the Road Celia x. Beans, Not Brain Food posted by gutenberg. One day last fall our daughter decided she would make us up a crock of homemade beans, damn but they were good, so good I had two or three helpings. You all know whats coming. Three O"clock in the morning, up to go to the bathroom but the pouch was three feet ahead of me laying on the floor, just like jet propulsion.
So her I am at 3am changing pouches and cleaning up the mess. My wife and daughter still heckle me when the subject of beans come up.
I now stick to one serving. It is now Dec. To avoid lengthy non-related threads, please only answer if you do know of a couple, or if you are in this situation yourself.
Just out of curiosity I would like to know if there is anybody out there, actually married to another ostomate? I have googled this question and did not find an answer.
Im in highschool and looking for someone who understands what im going through.
I had just gotten in a relationship when all of a sudden my doc said i need and illeostomy. I am currently not with this person anymore because they dont understand and truthfully no one will until i am at least So Im looking for a girl who has or has had an illestomy that i can be comfortable around and not hiding my stomach all the time.
I know its a long shot but what the hell. Help Making Someone Feel Comfortable posted by johnmckenna. Hi, I should start off and say that I do not have an ostomy, however the girl I am dating does. She has been open about it, pretty much since I met her, this is a few months ago now. She is a fantastic girl, and I am head over heels for her. I am also fairly certain this goes both ways.
We do have fairly good communication going about feeling, and about the operations etc. She is absolutely gorgeous, smart, funny, you name it Hi Im 24 and have been fighting this descion since I was Im really scared.
I never thought I would have this type of life and its hard enough being gay. But now they are telling me this might be my only choice and if thats the case whats the point really.
Gay men are fical, I know Ill never find someone who truley loves me if I go through with this. All gay men are suppose to have abs, great looks. Im scared that once I do this Ill be alone for the rest of my time here.
Improving Self Esteem. I have had a colostomy now for 3 yrs, and for the most part I have learned to live with it. But I cannot seem to feel confident about myself infront of my husband. I get uncomfortable when he starts touching me intimately because I am afraid he will accidentally touch my pouch. Does anybody else feel this way, or Dating Partners posted by christiesdad. Intimacy With 2 Ostomates posted by Tink I was hoping to get some advice on what it would be like to be intimate with a man who also has an ostomy.
R there restrictions on what can be done?